Light at the End of the Tunnel

1 Peter 5:8 "Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour."

Chemo #6 is done and I feel like the 'roaring lion' has chewed me up and spit me out.  Day 14 after treatment and I finally feel like my "chemo hangover" is lifting.

On day 8 I wrote the following entry:  As I embarked on my evening walk tonight, tears streamed down my face.  The pain was anguishing.  It took about a quarter mile but slowly my aching bones and feet began to loosen up.  It is such a blessing that I forget most of the side effects of chemo until I am once again wrapped in its clutches.  At least this time I am avoiding the itchy hives (by taking lots of allergy medicine) that covered my body in very strategic locations last treatment.  The hives have been replaced by burn marks on my hands and wrists .... at least they are not all over my body.

I very much look forward to my daily walks.  My goal is to walk for 30 minutes every morning and then again 30 minutes in the evening.  Some days my walks are all that I do.  Statistics say that by walking for 30 minutes every day, I increase my chances of survival by 50%.   My goal is to survive and so if walking increases my chances, I am doing it.

Last week I met my radiation oncologist.  He informed me that I should expect 5 weeks of radiation treatments and that I will have appointments 5 times a week.  I certainly can ascertain from this that I will be glowing in time for Christmas. 


Praise the Lord for and thank you to all the kind individuals that are helping me through this ... everyone who prays for me, the kind ladies who clean my house, the good people who show up with food and fresh vegetables, my friend who drives me to appointments without question, the lady who made me a quilt and knitted hats,  my sons who drive me everywhere and help me shop, my family and their unconditional love and support, everyone who comes to visit me or even send a card, my sister-in-law who lent me her own copy of The Help before she even read it, my cousins for medical advice, my sister for her brilliant daily text messages, phone calls and emails ... the list goes on and on ... small gestures some ... but they all mean a lot to me and have renewed my faith in human kindness.

My mom has a friend that is a cancer patient ... she told my mom that 'a good day is when I go to bed with clean sheets and clean underwear'. ... I get it. I finally get it. I will talk about the total exhaustion that cancer treatments cause in another blog. 


Chemo #6 is done .... 2 more to go .... Yahoo! I can see light at the end of my tunnel. God Bless everyone and may we all see the light at the end of our tunnels.

Perseverance

To get through difficult times we all have learned methods that help us to make it. Chemotherapy treatments have opened up a whole new set of 'getting through it' skills.  Last Wednesday night in midst of a huge headache, I was trying my best to be physiologically ready for the looming chemo treatment the following day.  I happened to open the Bible to  ....“And he said unto me, 'My grace is sufficient for thee: for My strength is made perfect in weakness.' Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ's sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong." -- II Corinthians 12:9-10.  Unable to read any more because of my headache I went to sleep with a back rub from my husband and "... when I am weak, then I am strong" echoing in my mind.

The next day, as we sat in the waiting room, I kept repeating "... when I am weak, then I am strong".  Upon being escorted into the treatment room (which just reminds me of a dairy barn ... people all lined up hooked to machines and the smell is something else ...).  I was given the nearest bed.  A kind nurse asked me how I was feeling ... nauseous.  The treatment had not even started, yet.  She suggested that it might be the smell of the treatment room and asked if I had anything pleasant to smell.  Amazingly, I had peppermint oil in my purse. A little on my temples and a few sniffs and the nausea began to subside.  God once again had provided a way to lesson my misery.  I do not remember much about this treatment because of the drugs given to stop allergic reactions to my current drug mix except that I continued to repeat "... when I am weak, then I am strong".

The best advice that I received early on in my chemotherapy treatments was  to "Hold God's hand tight, and listen to the Holy Spirit as he speaks to you, encourages you and comforts you".  Praise the Lord that in my delirium, I was able to remember enough of a Bible verse to get through this one.... 3 more to go ... and I am starting to see a light at the end of the tunnel. By holding tight onto God's hand and with His help I will persevere.