It is said that cancer changes people. I feel like the same person but I wake every day with a glow in my heart and a smile on my face. I am alive and what do I get to do today? Life has become a celebration. I enjoy every moment that I get to spend with my family and am in wonder at what surprises will happen everyday. Thursday had a fun surprise for us. My oldest son was accepted to the University of Calgary. He is going to embark on an adventure that will change his life and I get to watch it. Yesterday, I was able to watch my youngest son play in a basketball tournament. It is a trill to see him hit 3-point shots and celebrate when his team wins. Such a blessing it is to watch my children grow up. I have received an amazing gift. The gift of life and I am going to have some fun! Romans 8:21 “…God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God …”
The Christmas season is nearing and my standing joke is that I am putting on a ‘glow’ for Christmas: The glow of radiation.
It is somewhat of a science fiction type of experience. I go for radiation every weekday and as of yesterday have completed 11 of the 25 prescribed sessions.
My rules for radiation (there are always rules … the radiation ones are quite simple)
· Allowed 1 multi-vitamin, 1000 IU vitamin D, and a calcium/magnesium supplement daily
· Use a water based moisturizer on the area being radiated 2 – 3 times daily
· No green tea
· Pace yourself
· Be 15 minutes early for each treatment
· Do not move, laugh or even sneeze during treatments
It takes me about 45 minutes to get to the Tom Baker Cancer Centre (on good roads). I am so fortunate that I feel well enough to park east of the hospital on Toronto Crescent where parking is free as long as I am not parked there from more than 2 hours. From there I walk down the hill or slide (depending on the amount of snow), cross the street and enter the cancer center basement entrance. Radiation is in the basement and so I follow a yellow line to unit 1 where I slip my appointment schedule into a slot and change into a scratchy hospital gown.
The unit 1 radiation room is large with a really high ceiling and cold. The coldness is because the machine needs it cold. I am given a warm blanket for my legs but my upper body is left bare. I tell myself that this is good for my circulation. If I ask, the tech will also put a blanket on my arms. I lay on the hard narrow bed with my head on an apparatus and my arms above my head holding onto small handles that are directly above my head. This position is not entirely uncomfortable but I do have to block out the fact that they have raised the bed about five feet in the air. There are green grid lines that shine down on my body to which they line up my new tattoos and draw lines with markers to make sure that the treatment area(s) are exactly where they need to be. When things are lined up perfectly, treatment begins. Usually they start with the left side and then to the right. A large camera lens type apparatus rotates around me to the correct position, beeping starts and then loud buzz begins. I imagine that the buzzing is a laser gun burning my cancer to ashes. When finished it moves to the next position and this continues until the treatment is complete. Early on in the treatments, I learned I was special because they book an hour appointment for me. My allotted time takes up the time that 4 people usually take up and so “no” I am not allowed to change my appointment times. So I show up with a smile on my face and ready to go in my time slot.
So far radiation treatments have done little more than cause tiredness, skin irritation and a little nausea. My chest actually looks like I have been spending way too much time in a tanning salon and has become itchy. I deal with my tiredness by taking power naps. The feeling hits me in the afternoon and I just need to sleep. I have been having wonderful heavy healing naps.
I learned this week that with the knowledge that they have today, I will not be able to say that I am in remission. Perhaps in five years there will be a definitive test. Aggressive cancer treatment is a good thing because as in my case it kills cancer and gives the patient an extended life. I would never wish what I have gone through on anyone. Someday I will be able to say, “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.”, 2 Timothy 4:7 However, cancer in 2011 is not always a total death sentence. For the lucky ones it is a chance to figure out what life is all about.
Praise the Lord for the good roads, for my health and for this gifts that He has given me. Again, I am so grateful to all the kindness and prayers of the wonderful people around me. Merry Christmas to everyone! May you enjoy the season and be blessed with much happiness and love.
