Vision ....

Surgery on May 16, 2013 was a success.  My happy surgeon came into the room with a grin from ear to ear and said that he was able to remove all of the cancer.  The plastic surgeon then used a piece of my back to patch the hole.  Four days later, I am sore but not that bad.  I also noticed yesterday the the bruising was fading.  I really do not understand why they put a drain tube in the middle of my back and then told me to take care of it.  What do people do when they have no family at home?

A message on my phone when I got home from the hospital told me that I will be seeing the oncologist on Wednesday, May 22, 2013 and that chemo is booked for May 23.  Ugh! I was really hoping for more time to heal but I will go with the advice of the experts and do what they say.

These few days of quiet and sleep have given me time to think about my future and dream about life being normal again.  I have found it difficult not to get frustrated by all the things that I can not do.  However, I have come to realize that it is very important for me to have a vision and hope for the future and to ask for God's guidance and blessing in all that I do.

Where there is no vision the people perish.  Proverbs 29:18

I am loved.  I am valued.  I have hope! I am going to be free of cancer.  I look forward to small things ... having hair, being able to clean my bathroom, getting organized, going to church, gardening, visiting with friends, being cancer free ... just normal things.

I am so thankful for and blessed by those around me. Joy who spent the day at the hospital with me and then gave me a ride home, my mom who came to change my dressings and shower me, my family who help me with my drain tube and put up with my tears, and those who call or text to ask how I am doing.

Life is full.  Live it well! :)  May God bless you all!

Watermelon! and Surgery Booked

Yes ... watermelon is the one food that I am liking with my new chemo.  Force feeding myself has seemingly become a way of life for me.  I need to eat and I need my blood counts up .. so open my mouth and EAT ... slowly and not a lot but I eat.  (The chemo does seem to be working but I still don't enjoy it.) My boys are not very happy because my loss of appetite has a direct correlation on how much I am currently enjoying cooking. Good thing that they are old enough to fend for themselves.  Last week I walked through Costco, bald and beautiful with sunglasses mounted on top of my head.  I received some strange looks but I do not care.  It was hot and I was going for comfort.  The first time I went through chemo, I spent a lot of time hiding my 'baldness' so this lack of concern is a new thing and it feels good! :)

Thursday, May 2, or day 8, I had treatment #4 ... a Gencitabine and Herseptin combo.  The good news is that I actually think my tumour has shrunk and that this treatment did not leave me running to the bathroom.    The Nulasta prescription to get my white blood counts up  was given on day 2.  So ten days later I still feel my legs aching.  I continue my daily walks and do my best to choose food that has optimal nutrition ... which includes WATERMELON!

I saw my surgeon Monday morning and surgery has been tentatively booked for Thursday, May 16, 2013.  He will cut out the tumour(s) and any flesh that looks questionable.  A plastic surgeon will then attempt to put my arm back together.
 I have told the plastic surgeon not to do such a good job that I can not feel anything that tries to grow back.

The warm weather has arrived and the leaves are attempting to emerge. Life is Good!  My current prayer is that these cancer treatments will get the last of the cancer from my body and that I will have another 40 years to enjoy life!

For with God nothing is impossible.  Luke 1:37